R.I.P. Pee-wee Herman (Paul Reubens)

Remembering the place of pop culture

When you grow up miles from Hollywood, one common question is: have you met any famous people? I get the sentiment thinking Hollywood is a prairie of wild A-list stars roaming the streets with the likes of Pitt, Clooney, and Roberts. Hey there’s Leonardo DiCaprio eating a Chipotle burrito. It’s not like this. 

In fact, during the twenty-five years living in southern California, I only saw a handful of celebrities. Most were not A-list folks, or in films and TV. My dad and I met a couple of famous athletes at LA Clippers games like Magic Johnson, Howie Long, and James Edwards. Unless you count every server working on a script or auditioning for their first big acting gig. 

But there was that one time I spotted a celeb in the wild. I was with some friends walking down Hollywood Blvd minding our own business. Then we encountered him. Could it be? Yes, it was Pee-wee Herman. Known by his real name, Paul Reubens. 

I watched Pee-wee Herman’s Playhouse on Saturday mornings religiously, and one of my first movie memories is Pee-wee’s Big Adventure. Tell them Large Marge sent you. This was a big deal. Reubens is difficult to spot without the grey suit and red bow tie, but we knew it was him. 

Pee-wee style bike from movie

On Sunday night, Paul Reubens died after a six-year fight with cancer. Reubens hadn’t revealed the battle to many people and slipped into the night. Until Sunday, I hadn’t thought about Pee-wee in years. Reubens had some dark spots on his resume I recall from the 90s. He made a comeback after an arrest in the mid 90s and tried to work his way out of the Pee-wee persona. He did many roles in film and TV outside the world of Pee-wee, and was a brilliant comedian, actor, and despite the personal challenges, seemed like a generous and humble human. 

My thoughts drift to the place Pee-wee played in my life. I think of all the pop culture influences that show up in unexpected ways when you’re trying to figure out yourself, and the world. I had recently listened to an interview with Reubens, who talked about the influence of the circus growing up in Sarasota, Florida, the home of Ringling Bros. Circus. Paul said at four he wanted to be in the circus. He saw the world of the carney as another universe that was exciting and filled with possibilities. A world outside his boring family. Reubens knew one day he’d be a performer, all because of encountering the circus. 

For all the shallowness of pop culture, and much of it can be left on the side of the road, it does something important in our lives. It gives a sense there’s more out there. There’s an enormous world to explore. A world outside of your bedroom, home address, and family of origin. Reubens saw it with the circus. I saw it watching Reubens in Pee-wee’s Playhouse every Saturday morning. 

I’d watched these adults doing silly things and most of the humor was over my head. But it was a world which felt like it belonged on another planet. A planet I wanted to live on. These pop culture artifacts opened me up to a world of possibilities and the mystery we call the human experience.  

Film (and books) can do the same work. When I reflect on the movies I cherished as a kid, they too had this “opening up” effect. The Indiana Jones’, ETs, and Disney animated fare said: look kid, there is adventure to be had, there is love, loss, and more going on here. These films even taught me how to feel. ET still makes me cry thinking about a kid losing a friend. Albeit an alien, but you get it. We all know what it’s like to lose a friend or be abandoned by one. 

These stories, whether told in a book, on the movie screen, or flat screen, push us into a world bigger than ourselves. They serve as invitations to consider the bigger questions of life. Often they ask: what will you do with your one precious life?

Paul Reubens did what he loved to do. Perform. He loved to make people laugh and explore worlds through his characters. Reubens was a flawed man. But we’re all prone to wander, Lord, we feel it.  

I haven’t met many celebrities, and when I did, he was a grown man with a funny voice, a tight grey suit, and a red bow tie. But he made us laugh, he did the absurd, and embraced his alter ego of Pee-wee Herman. 

Paul Reubens opened up a bigger world to a kid trying to figure things out. In many ways, still trying to figure things out. 

Thanks for the laughs, Pee-wee, and rest in peace. When you get where you’re going, tell them Large Marge sent you…